Monday, October 31, 2011

Halloween Is Not for Me

   I hope everyone enjoyed their Halloween for me it's O.K. but it's no big deal for me. For a long time I couldn't remember why I didn't like Halloween, but in the last few years I have actually remembered and it is because when I was very young I was traumatized. I've told this story to my Daddy and the only point he corrected me on was age, I thought I was 5 years old when this happened but it turns out I was 3 years old. The story is as follows:

   When I was three years old and it is my first memory of going out trick or treating, my Mother was staying home to hand out the candy and so my Daddy was the one to take out on Halloween. Everything was going good until we went to this one house that had a screen door that has an aluminum bottom panel with the wooden front door shut ,well I rang the door bell or knocked on the door ( can't remember which) and I waited with a smile on my face so I could say trick or treat to the nice person ( and I'm sure they really were nice people)  that was going to answer the door. But when the front door opened, instead of the screen door opening  as well a devil mask came up from the aluminum part of the door. I was stunned for a few seconds and then I remember thinking that I had been a bad girl and that the devil had come to take me to Hell. I screamed, ran past my Daddy and started running down the sidewalk crying. Some how I thought to retrace our steps, so I'm going down the sidewalk doing this and I got to the point where my Daddy and I had crossed the road so I did that again, but by myself. I don't know if I looked straight at it or if it was my peripheral vision, but I remember the headlights and I don't think I stopped I'm pretty certain I just kept going because the next thing I remember I was in my Daddy's arms crying and wanting my Mommy. So of course I was taken home.

  I had been scarred by this incident ever since then. When I would go out on Halloween when I was a few years older something would happen that would trigger me and I would get all upset again. I think I was about  7 years old when I went out trick or treating for the last time. Can't say I felt like I missed anything, which may explain why I'm indifferent towards Halloween. And I guess it's a good thing I'm not that crazy about candy, because it has been known to go bad around me.

  Now a days I will go to the cemetery and put chrysanthemums at the headstones and make sure that the graves are all ready for All Saint's Day and All Soul's Day. There is nothing worse than a neglected grave, so I have heard a few times.

No comments: